Iron Bland 3 is a take-off of Iron Man 3.
Iron Man battles the Mandarin and no, he doesn't call the Avengers, so who cares?
- Tony Stark / Iron Man
- Trevor Slattery / the Mandarin
- Pepper Potts
- James Rhodes / Iron Patriot
- Harley Keener
- Iron Legion
- Aldrich Killian
- (Scene begins at Stark Mansion.)
- Pepper Potts: Tony Stark, I can not believe you got me a such a big and impersonal christmas present.
- Tony Stark: You mean the giant teddy bear?
- Pepper Pots: Oh, I thought you got me a fleet of helicopters firing at our house.
- [Roae, Boom]
- Tony Stark: What?! Those jerks told me the fleet of missile-firing helicopters was sold out. Yaah! Well, time for my fancy superhero transformation. Iron Man, Assemble! [Clanking] Ow! Ooh! Ooh! Ow! Ow! Watch yourself! [Squeaking] Heh. still working out some of the bugs. I said iron, not tin! [Clang] Let's be honest. We used up all the good stuff in "The Avengers" Movie.
- [Music Playing]
- (Title card: Iron Bland 3)
- (Scene goes to Tennessee.)
- Iron Man: Whoooa! Ahh! [Thud] Uuh! J.A.R.V.I.S.? What happened? Where are we?
- J.A.R.V.I.S.: You were attacked ny the mandarin.
- Tony Stark: The Mandarin? What did I ever do to him?
- J.A.R.V.I.S.: Is it possible he's angry because he offered you something years ago and you rudely turned him down?
- Tony Stark: Hmm...
- [Flashback to Mandarin at the Mall.]
- The Mandarin: Orange chicken. free sample of orange chicken?
- Tony Stark: No, thanks.
- The Mandarin: [Growls]
- Iron Man: Very possible, and so from the look of things, I'm guessing you followed my emergency plan of putting me in my correct suit and flying me to D.C.?
- J.A.R.V.I.S.: To D.C.? So you didn't say Tennessee? 'Cause to D.C. sounds a lot like Tennessee.
- Tony Stark: Tennessee? Why would I want to go there? D.C. is where the military is, where I'd be protected. That's where we are, isn't it?
- J.A.R.V.I.S.: Uh... yes, of course. I mean, why would I-- uh-oh, I'm running out of power... [Snoring]
- Tony Stark: Machines don't snore, J.A.R.V.I.S. You can;t even fake it well.
- J.A.R.V.I.S.: Still no power. [Snoring]
- Tony Stark: Note to self: This Iron Man carry-on luggage would be better if it had wheels.
- Harley Keener: Wow! Tony Stark, what are you doing here in Tennessee?
- Tony Stark: Tennessee?! J.A.R.V.I.S.! I'm trying to fix my suit. Think you can help?
- Harley Keener: Let me get this straight. You have access to "The Avengers" and about 50 "Iron Man" suits and you're asking me for help?
- Tony Stark: For you information, Pepper is in charge of my suits, and If know her she's putting them to good use as we speak.
- Pepper Potts: Look, Rhodey, I'm an Iron version of One Direction. [Dancing]
- Harley Keener: Ok, then what about "The Avengers"?
- Tony Stark: Well, "The Avengers" are, uh--uh-- Uh-oh, I'm running out of power. Errr...ooh! [Snoring]
- Harley Keener: Humans don't lose power, Tony. You can't even fake it well.
- Tony Stark: Still no power... [Snoring]
- (At Mandarin's base)
- Iron Man: Hold it right there, Mandarian. You're coming with me.
- Mandarian: I don't think so. I've got prisoners.
- Iron Man: Oh, no! You captured Captain America, too?
- Iron Patriot: Uh...no. Tony, It's me, Rhodey. you know, the Iron Patriot?
- Iron Man: The Iron Patriot? Then why heck aren't you in "The Avengers"? I mean, wouldn't a patriotic robot be so much cooler than an old guy from World War II who calls himself Captain America?
- The Mandarian: That's enough, Tony Stark. The time for you to die is now.
- Iron Man: Oh, really? 'cause I brought backup.
- (Iron Legion arrives)
- The Mandarian: Ok, hang on. hang on. Let's not do anything hasty here, 'cause well, I'm just an actor, see? The Mandarian is just a character I'm playing.
- Iron Man: A character?
- The Mandarian: Yes. couldn't you tell? I'm just copying the actor Hugo Weaving.
- Agent Smith: He's telling the truth, and I will never stop chasing you.
- Iron Man: Then that's even more of a reason to destroy him. get ready to see what an army of robots can do. [The Iron Legion dance] Pepper, did you do this?
- Pepper Potts: Uh, well, Rhodey came over and then we, uh-- uh-oh-- losing power. [Snoring]
- Iron Patriot: Yeah, why aren't I in "The Avengers"?
- (Segment ends)
- This is the first time that Iron Man 3 has showed up.
- Practically, this segment predicted Zayn' leaving from One Direction as when Pepper was dancing with the Iron Man suits, there were only four of them. Adding by, the four suits have wigs of Harry, Niall, Louis and Liam.