Gandalf and Bilbo as seen in "Hip Hop Hobbit"
Gandalf and Bilbo as they look in the 1977 Hobbit version
Hip Hop Hobbit is a take-off of the Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey.
This segment is from MAD Season 3, Episode 21 (73): Hip Hop Hobbit / The Monday Project.
Summary[]
Bilbo embarks on an old-school quest of rhyming and break dancing.
References[]
- the Hobbit (1977 TV movie)
Characters[]
- Bilbo Baggins / 1977 Bilbo
- Gandalf the Grey / 1977 Gandalf
- Galadriel
- Saruman the White
- Radagast the Brown
- Thorin
- Bombur
- Dwarf
- Smaug
- Gollum (5-second Cartoon)
Transcript[]
[The scene: Bilbo Baggins' house. Gandalf and Bilbo meet for the first time in preparation for a journey most... unexpected.]
Gandalf the Grey: What do you say, Bilbo Baggins? I'm looking for someone to join me on an adventure. Will you be in the Hobbit movie?
Bilbo Baggins: No way, Gandalf! I'm not doing that. Last time they made a movie based on the Hobbit, it was really bad news. [Bilbo gets up and heads for his TV.]
Gandalf: That was, like, 30 years ago. What was that, the 80's?
Bilbo: [Taking a VCR from the shelf] Let's pop it in and find out. (Bilbo puts in the VHS tape into the VCR. The video plays...)
(...then rap music starts playing, and the title card Hip Hop Hobbit appears)
[HIP HOP HOBBIT]
(Fades to 1977 Bilbo's house)
1977 Bilbo: (rapping)
♪ Well, my name is Bilbo and I'm here to say
I'm expected to go on no adventures today
I'm a Hip Hop Hobbit and I like to rap
Rapping's just rhymes, it's simple as that
So please don't be scared, please don't run
Rap's all about just havin' big fun! ♪
[FUN]
(Fades to Bilbo's house)
(Record Scratching)
(all dwarfs dance and pan to every dwarf, then fade back to 1977 Bilbo scratching the record )
1977 Bilbo: (rapping)
♪ Sometimes I rap hard, sometimes I rap soft
I'll pass the mic to my man Gandalf
When I pass the mic, he'll take the mic
And he'll have the mic and he'll use the mic
Gandalf will rap, just like me
But he's a different man, he's-- well, you'll see... ♪
[FRESH]
1977 Gandalf: (rapping)
♪ Well, my name is Gandalf and I'm on the mic
Now I'm gonna rap anything I like
Bilbo, it's time to go on a quest
The Dwarves need your help 'cause you're the best
So grab your bags, 'cause there's not much time
Hey, have you noticed, everything rhymes!
All this rapping may sound foreign
But to clear it up is my man Dwarf Thorin
When I hand him the mic, he'll open his hand
Then he'll take the mic with his-- ♪
[Bilbo Baggins fasts forwards the tape, with fast images of Thorin rapping, but no sound]
Bilbo: I'm just gonna fast forward right there, because... there were 13 Dwarves, and they each explain what rap is, and how handing off the mic works.
Gandalf: No way! All 13 Dwarves rap?
[Bilbo resumes playback]
Bombur: (rapping)
♪ Well, my name is Bombur and I'm holding a mic ♪
[Fast forward]
[Playback]
Dwarf: (rapping)
♪ When I extend the mic, he'll see the mic
and his hands are capable-- ♪
[Fast forward]
[Back to Bilbo and Gandalf of present day]
Bilbo: [chuckles] Wait 'til you see the end. You're going nuts, trust me.
[Playback resumes, with '77 Bilbo rap-battling Smaug]
1977 Bilbo: (rapping)
♪ I'm a hip, I'm a hop, I'm a hippity Hobbit
There's no way you can stippity-stop it
I'm the wearer of Rings, I'm the lucky number
I'll steal your gold while you slumber
I'm a singing fly, I'm a real web cutter
Are you shaking now, or did I stutter?
I'm the hip, the hop
The hibby, Hobbity, hip hip ♪
[Rapping incoherently]
♪ Hippity-Hop ♪
[Having taken too much rap for a lifetime, Smaug coughs and drops dead. The video ends. Bilbo's TV turns off, and the VCR is ejected, of which the Hobbit takes.]
Gandalf: You're right, Bilbo. We must reassemble the Fellowship and return to Mount Doom [takes the VHS tape from Bilbo] to cast this into the fires in which it was formed.
[Gandalf takes his leave. Just then, after a short pause, Bilbo puts what he learned from the tape about rap into good use.]
Bilbo: ♪ Well... ♪
[But that's another story for another time.]
[End segment]
5-second Cartoon[]
(Bilbo raps with Gollum.)
Trivia[]
- This is the second time there was a parody of the Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey. The first was the MADvent Calendar from the start of Fantastic Four Christmases / Red & White Collar (the previous episode).
- This sketch parodies two versions of the Hobbit, which are the Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey and the 1977 TV movie version.
- This is the 38th segment that the name of a MAD parody is said.
- Error: When 1977 Gandalf had the suitcase with "Rohan", "Gondor", "Rivendale", and "Mordor" on it, "Rivendell" was spelled as "Rivendale".
- Antagonist: The Hip Hop Hobbit tape