Tom Hanks, Nicolas Cage, and old Indiana Jones arrive in Who-Town to solve the mystery of who stole Christmas.
- Tom Hanks
- Nicolas Cage
- Indiana Jones
- National Treasure
- the Simpsons
- Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas (film)
- Rotten Tomatoes
- Narrator (Not in story)
- Who Mayor
- Tom Hanks
- Nicolas Cage (Guy from National Treasure and a bunch of others) (WARNING: IN HIS OUTFIT FROM KNOWING!)
- Indiana Jones (Adventurer)
- the Grinch
- Bart Simpson-Like Who
- Betty Lou Who (Cindy Lou Who)
(Scene begins at Who-Ville.)
Narrator: 'Twas the morning of Christmas when the Whos had awakened,
To find that their stockings and gifts had been taken.
And though you'd think a Who Christmas could survive just on joy...
(a person punches the man singing causing a grunt)
Turns out, those old Whos really wanted those toys.
But the town came together, they stood shoe to shoe.
No one needed to speak, 'cause they already knew,
That the way to save Christmas, or so it was told,
Was simply to solve Da Grinchy Code.
(Title card: Da Grinchy Code)
Which was lucky for them 'cause out of the air
Came a man who looked just like Tom Hanks with bad hair,
And he brought along friends like Nicolas Cage,
And old Doctor Jones who was also his age. (Indiana Jones cracks his spine and yells.)
The town pointed with pride, their hearts started to swell.
Nicolas Cage: I know.
Narrator: Said Nick Cage.
Nicolas Cage: I have bad hair as well.
Narrator: His friend interrupted...
Tom Hanks: We're looking for clues,
And this Dr. Seuss book is the thing that will use.
If I stare at this page for a small length of time,
I'm pretty darn sure of what we will find.
Who Citizen #1: The culprit?
Who Mayor: The thief who pulled off this heist?
Tom Hanks: No! The fact that these books are WAY OVERPRICED! ($23.99 (CHEAP!))
Narrator: The Who's question is answered, but had no replies,
I guess that why they're known as the Whos, not the Whys. (Why-Town, Capital of Why-oming)
Indiana Jones: I'll take this stick here, my Staff of Ra,
And shove it on up your tiny Who-Kah. (a Who gulps and his face turns white)
Then the rays of the sun will melt all the snow,
And show us the place where your presents did go.
Narrator: He positioned his stick just as he had planned,
But it did little more than to give them all tan. (the Who's faces begin to burn and turn red)
Then Nicolas Cage said to the mayor...
Nicolas Cage: Can I look at your desk? It may shed a new layer.
Narrator: And under the seal, he found an inscription,
And closed both his eyes acting out his description.
Nicolas Cage: I'm led to believe that the man called "The Grinch",
Stole all your things and took off on a pinch.
He cracked his whip on an antique sleigh,
And knew the right codes to get out the same way.
Who Citizen #2 (Bart Simpson lookalike): You found all that out from the desk in his room?
Nicolas Cage: Not really.
Narrator: Said Cage.
Nicolas Cage: I just watched the cartoon. (Pulls out a DVD of the cartoon)
Narrator: When all of a sudden, a blanket of snow
Covered the men from their heads to their toes.
It was the Grinch himself, who arrived with the stuff.
Grinch: You're lying!
Narrator: He said.
Grinch: And I'm calling your bluff.
From that story you told was sure to surmise,
That the bandits you seek are really you guys.
See, I found that old sled that I supposedly used
To steal all the gifts from all of the Whos.
But if memory serves, and the truth might just sting,
It's you who has access to antique things. (points to Nicholas Cage)
And that whipping you heard came from old Doctor Jones,
While the code-meister here broke into your homes.
Narrator: The men blinked and reacted the way guilty men do,
With a tug of their shirt and not one gulp, but two. (Indiana Jones cracks his neck when he gulps and yells)
Then Betty Lou Who who was no more than two,
And who's name we have changed said that no one will sue,
Betty Lou Who: Why are you trying to frame Mr. G?
Clearly he's not as well off as you three.
He's got a bad rep from here to Whobatatoes,
And his movie did poorly on "Rotten Potatoes".
(the website Rotten Potatoes shows a rotten picture of the Grinch with the Spud Scale showing 3%)
Narrator: But everything changed when he solved the Whos' crime,
And the Grinch now had friends for an awful long time.
But not 'cause he learned the true meaning of things, (the Grinch shrugs)
But for simply reuniting the Whos with their bling.
And as for the men, well in Who-Ville they say,
That their movie appeal shrank three times that day.
(The three men run away because they are being chased by the Grinch's dog Max, when the Whos wave good-bye, one of them holds a sign that reads "Happy Who-lidays!")
Narrator: Their Who-Pods were missing,
Their Who-Dinkeys were plucked.
Their copies of MAD were--
Well, no such luck.
- This is the first Christmas segment, and this segment also had a rhyming transcript.
- This is the first time MAD showed a 1957 Dr. Seuss book (Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas!).
- Nicolas Cage is wearing the same outfit from the movie Knowing.
- Antagonists: Tom Hanks, Nicolas Cage, and Indiana Jones
- When Indiana Jones breaks his back, he makes the same sound the football players did when they got crushed by the gods in Class of the Titans. (The groan also appeared in Juicy Jr.'s Triple Pounder.)
- Rotten Potatoes is a spoof on Rotten Tomatoes.
- Bart Simpson (from the Simpsons) appears as one of the Whos.
- In real life, the Grinch movie was called How the Grinch Stole Christmas, not Stealing Grinchmas.
- This is the seventh segment that the name of a MAD parody is said. The previous segments were: