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Are You Karate Kidding Me?

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Are You Karate Kidding Me? Exteneded Edition is a take-off of the Karate Kid.

This segment is from MAD Season 1, Episode 18: Are You Karate Kidding Me? / The Fresh Prawn of Bel-Air.

Summary

Moving to China can be a big change, especially when a talking panda keeps beating you up.

References

Characters

Transcript: Exteneded Edition

Dre Parker (Son of Will Smith in American): I hate China, with all its know-it-all cookies and overly-tall walls! This place STINKS!

Kai-Lan (Translated from Chinese: Broccoli): You just have to get to know it. I'm Kai-Lan; That's Chinese for "broccoli."

Dre Parker: I'm Dre; That's American for "Son of Will Smith".

[Gong noises are heard as Dre Parker pops out of Will Smith's head.]

Kai-Lan: You shouldn't talk to me in front of the school bullies.

Dre Parker: Why? Afraid I get black and blue? [someone punches Dre in the face, soon it reveals to be Po]

Po: More like black and WHITE!

[cut to "Are You Karate Kidding Me?" title card]

Po: You think you can just show up and star in a karate movie 'cause you're cute? I'm a panda; I'll always be cute. You got three, maybe four years of cuteness left in ya.

Mr. Han: Noodles?

Po: Ooh, I love noodles.

[punch]

Mr. Han: Did you know notice how I beat you using only this bowl?

Po: No, I was too busy watching my coach beating your guy with a spoon.

[smacks]

Mr. Han: Enough! We will save fighting for tournament.

[gong]

Mr. Han: You must learn discipline. Take off your backpack and throw it down.

Dre Parker: But I got it from my friend, Dora.

Backpack: I'm the backpack, the backpack, the backpack!

Mr. Han: Throw it down.

Backpack: Ow, what are you doing?

Mr. Han: Pick up. Throw it down. Pick it up. Throw it down. Pick it up. Throw it down. Pick it up. Throw it down. Pick it up. Throw it down. Pick it up. Throw it down.

Dre Parker: What did that teach me?

Mr. Han: Nothing. I just hate that Dora the Explorer show.

[gong]

Mr. Han: Many mysteries will be answered today but ours starts with one question.

Dre Parker: What's that?

[smacks]

Dre Parker: Ow!

Mr. Han: Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself?

Dre Parker: Ugh, Po's got a much better trainer.

Mr. Han: True! I put sleeping potion in his lunch.

[sneeze]

Mr. Han: You must feel the force flowing through you. Only then can you defeat Vader.

Dre Parker: Vader? I thought I was training to fight Po.

Mr. Han: Sorry, all training montages look alike.

Yoda: Looking to be sued you are, hmm? As are you.

Edward: We're not even training, you snot-covered goblin.

Mr. Han: Enough! We'll save fighting for tournament.

Dre Parker: Wait a minute. What kind of tournament are we training for?

Referee: Welcome to the Chicken Fight Championship. Let's have a clean fight and no fouls except for the chicken kind. Begin!

[they all fight, until Dre is left standing]

Referee: And the winner is--

Dora: Wait just a second!

[All Gasp!]

Dora: Who did this to my backpack?

[short silence]

Backpack: I have such a concussion, I can't remember.

Dora: Do you know who did this to Backpack?

[blue arrow clicks at Dre]

Dora: Gracias. HYAAAAAAAAAAH!

[smacks]

Dre Parker: Ow! Ow! Ooh! Ow! Augh! (Translated from Chinese: Somebody help me!)

Kai-Lan: That's Chinese for "Somebody help me!"

[more smacks]

Dre Parker: Aaaaah! Oooh! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Miss Piggy: What Dora Gets Revenge on Dre Parker.

Buzz : Yo Yeah! Were Now Gonna Save Dre Parker So He Can't Be a Karate Trainer

(While Miss Piggy and Buzz Punches Dora.)

Miss Piggy: Give Up Karating Dre Parker

Buzz: Yeah! Same on You! Dora! Dre You May Not Be a Karate Trainer Yet and Sometimes Will Be.

Drobot: Hey 2 to You Try to Wreck the Movie! (Shoots Lasers at Miss Piggy and Buzz and He Leaves with the 31 Skylanders

(Segment Ends)

Transcript: Original Storyboard Version

(Start at China)

Here are some diffs:

(Kai-Lan pops out of broccoli)

Po: No, I was too busy watching my coach beat up your kid.

Dre: STOP IT ALREADY! Where did you learn these techniques?

Mr. Han: From a wise old puppeteer.

Jim Henson: (While whacking a Kermit puppet) Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself?

Trivia

  • This is first time that the two Nick Jr. characters are shown in a MAD episode. Two Nick Jr. characters appeared in this segment are Dora from Dora the Explorer and Kai-Lan from Ni Hao Kai-Lan.
  • The title is a pun on the saying "Are you kidding me?".
  • Dog Mail, The Itsy Bitsy Super Spider, and Big Ba-- JACOB!!! segments appeared on the sidebar of the YouTube video.
  • It is unknown why Bella, Edward, Luke Skywalker, and Yoda were in the tournament. For Luke and Yoda, it might be because Yoda said that Mr. Han and Dre were willing to be sued, and said the same for Bella and Edward, which is probably why they were in it.
  • Antagonist: Po, Dora the Explorer, Drobot (In the Exteneded Edition)
  • In the original movie, the "Take off your backpack and throw it down." used to be "Take off your jacket, put it down, pick it up, put it on the rack, take it off the rack, and put it on." and repeat that order many times.
  • the time in the Original Version. in the almost end. Dre Parker has Goofy's voice
  • Alfred E. Neuman appears in the start of the Extended Version.
  • Kai-Lan speaks English.

Original Video

  • MAD - Are You Karate Kidding Me03:25

    MAD - Are You Karate Kidding Me

    Original Video of Segment

    When Mr. Han explained where he got the "why are you hitting yourself?" method, Jim Henson is doing the method to Kermit the Frog.
  • Kick Buttowski is also referenced in the original video, as Mr. Han looks at his Kick Buttowski watch and runs away to watch it.
  • The fact that "Kai-lan" means "broccoli" is true, as "Kai-lan" is a type of broccoli in real life.

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